Heartstrings
by MorgantheFae
Summary: For CLAMP Femslash Week 2019. Throughout everything, Kendappa and Souma always have each other.
1. Day 1: Role Reversal

**Disclaimer:** _RG Veda _still belongs to CLAMP, but at least now i have a full set of the manga.

* * *

**Day 1: Role Reversal**

It was hard for the last survivor of the Kendappa tribe to wait for the god-king's alchemist to return from her duties at Zenmi Castle. It would be one thing if she could expect Souma to make a slip in ingredients – make her potion into a poison instead of a cure – but her lover never did. Instead, Kendappa had to worry about what would happen if Taishakuten found out Souma was sheltering a renegade.

It was with relief, mixed with a little regret, that she welcomed Souma home in the evening. Souma always came home worn out. She would never admit it to Kendappa, but it was the stress that wrecked her. She collapsed onto her bed, and Kendappa curled up next to her. If there was nothing else she could do for Souma until she came face-to-face with Taishakuten, she could at least make her lover feel better after the difficulties of court. She couldn't even imagine taking Souma's place.

"How are you feeling?" she asked quietly.

"Exhausted," Souma admitted. Her eyes had been unfocused in the general direction of the high ceiling, but she flicked her gaze over to Kendappa and gave her a tired smile.

Kendappa ran her fingertips over the lines in Souma's palm. "It must be so hard to serve him, after he killed your family."

Souma swallowed. "He needs an alchemist. I'm not in any danger now, since i'm the only one who can do it."

"That's not what i meant." Kendappa's eyes flashed in the dark, and her grip tightened on Souma's hand. "He _killed_ them, Souma, and you have to look into his eyes and act like you don't hate him. How can you stand it?"

Souma swallowed, trying to force her pounding heart back down out of her throat. It was one thing the two of them couldn't agree on. "It's better than being killed by him. He's too strong, Kendappa. I wish you would stay here, with me."

Kendappa's head was shaking. "I can't, Souma. You know i can't. I'll kill him, and then you won't have to live in fear anymore."

Souma pulled her close, and buried her face in Kendappa's hair. "I know how you feel," she whispered. "I do, but i worry for you. I'm so afraid you won't come back to me."

Kendappa wove her fingers into Souma's hair and drew her head up so she could kiss her. "I will," she said, her voice rough with unshed tears. "I promise you, Souma, i will _always_ come back to you. No matter what happens, you can count on that." She kissed Souma again.

She didn't say the other thing, the one Souma always refused to listen to. When the two of them were together, they were perfect. They would be unstoppable. If they combined their skills, they could kill Taishakuten quickly, before he even saw them coming. Souma didn't believe they could do it, but Kendappa knew their love gave them a strength a man like Taishakuten could never have.

* * *

**A/N:** So technically i missed the first day because it snowed and i couldn't get online, but i'm doing it anyway. I've always wanted to do a fandom week, and this is the first time i'm anything remotely resembling ready. Better late than never.


	2. Day 2: Historical AU

**Day 2: Historical AU**

_Keiou 1 (1865)_

Souma lingered in the street outside the okiya. It was cold, but she managed to look busy as she waited for the geisha to come out on their way to their afternoon lessons. She'd come too early again. She'd arrived late enough to miss the merchants conducting their business, but somehow she always managed to turn up before the geisha were ready for the day.

Finally, the sliding door opened, and women started to come out of the building. Some of them had dance practice, others music, tea, or calligraphy. Souma probably should have learned their schedules to make her job easier, but there was only one woman here she cared about.

Speak of the devil, and she shall appear. Kendappa came out, deep in conversation with another woman. Her eyes met Souma's, but only for a moment before she returned her attention to her companion.

Souma, too, continued to pretend she wasn't waiting. It was critical that the two of them didn't appear to know each other.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kendappa reach up to touch her elaborately-styled hair. After a moment, she sent her companion on with a laugh and a wave before turning to Souma – to all appearances, because Souma happened to be there.

"My hair is slipping," Kendappa said. "Fix it for me?"

Without hesitation Souma crossed over to her and reached up to her hair. Even though Souma was taller than the geisha, with Kendappa's tall geta they were almost equal in height. She fiddled with Kendappa's plum blossom hairpins while the other woman spoke in a low voice meant only for her.

"There's going to be a meeting tomorrow night, at the Himawari-ya. A few of our girls have been asked to attend. Can i hope to see you there?"

"Of course," Souma answered, not wanting to let go of her hair just yet. She wasn't even doing anything, not really; if Kendappa's hair truly _had_ been slipping, Souma's touch would have only made it worse. "I'll take any chance to see you."

Kendappa laughed softly and turned to her. "I'm yours, you know. You don't need to ogle the back of my neck."

Souma flushed and tried to deny it. She couldn't help noticing Kendappa's bare nape, of course, but she would never let it distract her from their work.

Kendappa smiled and brushed Souma's loose hair back from her face, but her eyes were unusually serious as she asked, "You know you're the only one i love, don't you?"

Souma knew. She could feel in her bones how much Kendappa loved her. But at the same time, Kendappa flirted with people for a living. Souma could never be sure if some official with prospects would sweep her off her feet. Souma was only a shinobi with nothing to offer other than herself. She feared the day when Kendappa took a danna.

"I know," she said softly. Suddenly businesslike, she added, "Tomorrow night, at the Himawari-ya. I'll be there."

Kendappa took both Souma's hands in hers. "Don't forget," she replied brightly. "I'll be waiting."

* * *

All was quiet when Kendappa and two of her coworkers entered the Himawari-ya the next night. They were shown into a large party room where members of the Shinsengumi were waiting for them to arrive.

The Shinsengumi weren't wearing their trademark blue haori, of course. Not for a secret meeting like this. The last thing they wanted to do was to proclaim to all Japan that the Shinsengumi were convening on this little teahouse.

_Not so secret,_ Kendappa thought, before putting on her best smile to flirt with and tease the hardworking "defenders of Kyoto." Souma and the others would be here soon. It was her job to keep the samurai entertained until then.

She managed, of course. Kendappa and her colleagues were top-class entertainers. Their guests never realized she had sold them out. Not even after the loyalists arrived.

In the commotion, Kendappa looked for Souma. The shinobi had promised to be here. She was a fighter; it wasn't only her job to pass along information to the rebel samurai.

The other girls shrieked and fled. Kendappa pressed herself into a corner as if she were afraid. She had no fear of the battles that needed to be fought to free their nation, but more importantly, she had to see.

The men fighting ignored her. Typical. Kendappa did have one moment of excitement when one of the Shinsengumi, reeling from sake and the surprise attack, had his blade deflected and stumbled toward her. Kendappa just had time to whip out a dagger from her obi and block his wild swing. She could see his eyes go wide with shock, and she smiled her sweetest smile.

A moment later, the man's eyes rolled up, and he fell to reveal Souma standing behind him. She pulled her short sword from his back and offered her free hand to Kendappa, who took it. "You came," she said.

"I promised, didn't i?" Souma replied. "You're not hurt, are you?"

"I'm fine," Kendappa said. "In fact, i'm all the better for having you here."

It was hard to tell with the low light and Souma's dark skin, but Kendappa could have sworn Souma blushed. "I'll always come for you. But you shouldn't be in the middle of the battle. Please go outside with the others."

_So polite,_ Kendappa thought. She could have pointed out that she was only on the periphery of the battle, but with Souma here, it was no longer so important. "Won't you escort me?" she asked. "Who knows what could happen."

Souma blocked another sword without looking. "Of course."

The other geisha were not, in fact, just outside the teahouse. They must have decided that the arrival of the loyalists, and the ensuing battle, marked the end of the party, and either gone on to their next engagements or fled all the way back to the okiya.

How dull.

"You were late." Kendappa pouted up at Souma.

"I'm so sorry," the shinobi replied. "They sent me on an errand at the last minute. I could have told them it was better suited to Okada."

"Okada," Kendappa scoffed. "You're better than him. He can only kill, but you're good for so much more. They wouldn't have known to come here tonight if it weren't for you."

Souma shook her head. "I only carried the message. You were the one who did the work."

"And to think, all it took for me to betray them was a pretty face." Kendappa had meant to lighten the mood, but Souma continued to look troubled.

"I hate putting you in danger like this," she said. "You shouldn't be anywhere near a battle. But it's the only way we can catch the Shinsengumi off guard." It was only through the work of women like Kendappa that they were able to track the Shinsengumi's activities at all.

"I know." Kendappa laid her hands on Souma's shoulders, then trailed down her arms to take her hands. "It's necessary for now. But i promise you, Souma, i'll retire once the emperor is restored to power. The two of us can open a teahouse together."

Souma closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against Kendappa's. "I'd like that."

"Once the emperor is restored to power," Kendappa murmured again into the space between them.

* * *

**Omake:** "Won't you come back with me?" Kendappa asked. "After all, _women_ are allowed inside the okiya." Her tone made it very clear what she meant, and Souma's sudden stammering showed that she understood perfectly.

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**A/N:** Technically CLAMP already did the KenSou historical AU in _Tsubasa_. I knew i wanted mine to be AU from everything CLAMP's done, so my next thought was a geisha spy during the Bakumatsu, because those women don't get enough attention.


	3. Day 3: Love Languages

**Day 3: Love Languages**

Souma sits cross-legged on the floor of Kendappa's personal chamber, sharpening her Twin Moon Leaves. It's a soothing job with Kendappa playing in the open air where her room meets the balcony. The sun is setting. Soon Souma will need to light a candle to see the edges on her blades, but she doesn't want to just yet. The way the red evening light falls on her lady, reflecting golden on the deep black of her hair, is a sight that never fails to take her breath away. She won't do anything to ruin that.

It's maybe not the best time to sharpen her blades, of course, but Souma's hands haven't slipped yet. She lets them go still as she looks up at Kendappa's fingers on her harp strings.

This evening's piece is beautiful, sad and complex. It tugs at Souma in a way she can't quite place. When Kendappa stops she can't bear the silence.

"I haven't heard that before," she says, and Kendappa's eyes open. Souma hadn't even realized they were closed. "What is it?"

"It's called 'New Moon'," Kendappa replies softly.

"It's beautiful."

"I wrote it for you," Kendappa admits, and Souma's stomach does a happy twist.

"For me?" She can't have heard right. No one has ever done something like that for her before.

"Yes." The corners of Kendappa's mouth twitch into a smile, but she looks anxious in a way she hadn't before. "Do you like it?"

"I do." Souma crosses the floor to lay her hand on Kendappa's knee. "It's the most incredible thing anyone's ever done for me. Will you play it again?"

Kendappa's smile is real now, surer than it was a moment ago. "For you, anything. Sit beside me?"

Souma does, leaning her head softly against Kendappa's shoulder. It's getting too dark to do anything more with her sickles anyway. She should put them up off the floor before someone steps on them, but Kendappa is playing again and it can wait.

* * *

**A/N:** Important note about the best typo i ever made: when i started work on this particular story, i accidentally typed that Souma "looks up at Kendappa's fingers on her heartstrings." It's honestly beautiful and it was so hard to change it back to "harp strings" for the sake of the story.


	4. Day 5: Yin & Yang

**Day 5: Yin & Yang**

Souma returned to Gandarahja late in the evening, the blood from one of Kisshouten's errands still on her hands. It was rare that Kisshouten asked her to kill, but Souma welcomed the opportunity. Each death brought her that much closer to Taishakuten, and justice for her clan.

Each time she killed, she forced herself to think only of justice.

Below the castle, she stopped to wash her hands and arms in a spring. It wasn't that she needed to hide the evidence of what she had done – she and Kendappa had no secrets from each other – but she didn't like it. Kendappa was so pure, and beautiful, like a sun-warmed breeze. Souma didn't want to sully her with her own darkness.

Sometimes Kendappa did have to kill, if a spy slipped past the guards and into her home. Souma always reproached her for it. The thought of Kendappa's gentle hands bringing someone to their death was too much to bear, but Kendappa's promises to leave it to Souma the next time only lasted until the next time actually came.

Souma shook her hands dry and leaped up to the moving castle itself. She'd just have to do better. She might have become a killer living only for revenge, but at the very least, she should be able to protect one musician from the monsters in human form that lived in Tenkai.

* * *

That night, after Souma had fallen asleep, Kendappa sat up alone beside her. She brushed a lock of Souma's hair gently over her ear.

Dear, dear Souma. She was so sweet. She tried so hard to take care of Kendappa. Even when she fought, she had only the best of motives. Nothing like Kendappa at all.

She could never find out that Kendappa had dedicated herself to Taishakuten's strength. The truth would break her, poor soul. Souma really was too pure for Taishakuten's Tenkai.

Kendappa sighed and wriggled down into the sheets beside her lover, pressing a kiss to Souma's forehead. "Good night, Souma," she murmured. _I wish i could be the innocent you think i am._

But, of course, even with her lover asleep, she could never say that part out loud.


	5. Day 6: Something Borrowed

**Day 6: Something Borrowed**

Kendappa sat outside on the rail of her balcony, watching Tenkai drift by below her. She'd taken to spending her free time like this lately, watching as if there were a chance she'd get a glimpse of Souma on her travels.

She touched the unmatched earring she wore, hidden under her hair. It was warm from her body heat, but it wasn't the kind of warmth she wanted._ Souma . . ._

She couldn't think of a way out. She couldn't break her oath to Taishakuten, and Souma would never forsake her clan's vengeance.

Kendappa couldn't ask, _Why must you go?_ She knew perfectly well. She couldn't say, _Come back to me. Let things be._ Souma would never be happy, and if Souma wasn't happy, Kendappa wouldn't be either. One day, Taishakuten was sure to tell her to do her duty, and she would.

Kendappa had a terrible feeling she'd be left alone in the end, with nothing but a single earring to warm her. It would be a terrible fate.

* * *

Far away, on the other side of Tenkai, Souma relieved Ryuu-ou on watch duty. Yasha-ou would take over for the early morning hours, but the midnight shift was hers.

Hers to watch alone, waiting for someone to attack them while her thoughts chased themselves around her head like shooting stars. They all started from around the same place and spread out across the sky.

She missed Kendappa. After all the time she'd spent waiting for the chance to move against Taishakuten, now that she had it, all she wanted was to go back home to Gandarahja and be with the woman she loved.

She raised a hand to her ear, caressing the earring whose match she had given to Kendappa as if its curve were a part of her lover's body. "I will come back . . ."


End file.
